Migraine: First in ages -irksome, to say the least.


I am irked: Could do without this, frankly…

They started in my mid-teens: Disabling headaches, with accompanying aura, which had me bed-bound and moaning with pain in a darkened room. In 2003, I was hospitalised (and had a brain scan and lumbar puncture) with the worst migraine thus far: It went on for ten days or more.

What can I tell you? Severe, or continuous, stress brings them on. The one in 2003 came about three weeks into jury service in a murder trial. As a result, I had to be removed from the jury.

Saturday morning, I woke feeling dizzy, had vertigo, muffled hearing, tinnitus and strange alterations in my vision. Panic too. In retrospect, the hours at the laptop were not a good idea – but we do not always think these things through, do we? Besides, it had been such a long time since my last migraine that I assumed, and hoped, that they were finally behind me for good.

The aura manifestations continued all over the weekend. I was not able, unfortunately, to find, let alone press, panic and worry’s off button. The situation I am in is so stressful and anxiety-inducing at present that, in a sense, I am only surprised that it has taken this long for my head to get in on pain’s act.

The headache (huh! such an anodyne word for migraine’s ghastliness) struck yesterday evening. I got into bed and lay in darkness, the way I had as a teenager. Flashes of dark light seemed to be zooming through my skull. I couldn’t get comfortable, no matter how I lay. Cotton wool filled my mind, barring coherent thought but, most horribly, allowing the demons of panic (particularly those which insisted that I was having a stroke) to gibber and snigger and tweak my fear response to their evil hearts’ content. The unremitting hammers of pain thudded up and down. I felt sick every time I moved. I wanted to cry – but knew, from ancient experience, that it would make things worse.

It is like a heavy band round the head, a constricting circle of intense pain, a crown of thorns. My eyes look bloodshot and are sore. I feel shaky and afraid this morning. The ringing in the head remains, as do wispy clouds of pain, and surges of nausea.

If I could just stop worrying, it would help. But there is no time out from my current situation. I’ve got to see it through to the end – an end I hope will be the polar opposite of bitter. But I am up against it. My positive visions are, in a manner of speaking, doing battle with much darker and more negative ones – and, unfortunately, I do not have the power to banish the latter because they do not emanate from my mind. Arrowing them back to sender has had no effect thus far, though I do take my inner bow and fire strongly and accurately.

The migraine has been a nasty jar, an unpleasant surprise. But, given my somatic history, it shouldn’t have been, should it?

48 thoughts on “Migraine: First in ages -irksome, to say the least.

  1. Heya, it’s lovely to connect. I just wanted to say I am the same as you and I worry all the time. I also used to get upset and I realised that they only got worse. I guess we learn from them. Do you know what triggers yours? They sound pretty intense when you have them. x

    Liked by 1 person

  2. doodletllc

    Oh migraines…I had them for years and years…mine were probably hormonal with a dash of stress…horrid. People that never had them, call them headaches and shrug…but migraines are so beyond headaches…as well you know. I was never able to take any pain medication because a sip of water and I would be instantly sick. So instead I endured 12 hours of pain. Averaging one per month. And missing work. Not good. Everyone has advise for a cure…I do too…Acupuncture…it really did work for me. Stay well. I do so enjoy your blog.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I’ve never had a migraine before, but it seems that they appear more frequently in women than men.

    Responding to your last paragraph, the agony that you describe sounds like something that one can never inure themselves to, even if it happens repeatedly.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That’s interesting, Noah; I didn’t know that they were more common in women. I am not entirely surprised, however: I suspect there is a large hormonal element involved, certainly for younger women. Not so much for crones like myself! xxx


          1. Perhaps something in the wiring of some people’s brains makes the gift and curse of migraine more likely; after all, we have most certainly not made great strides in understanding the mind’s true nature!

            Liked by 1 person

  4. Bloody things, been getting them since I fell off a trapeze at fourteen. For me bright light is the trigger (yup I wear sunglasses outside habitually, cool ones naturally), or changes in temperature. The affliction is personally tailored (no pun intended!) to the sufferer but with me it’s three painkillers at the start, sit down and, after long practice, relax. I can shift one in about half an hour. (This may not help but I’ve got it to a fine art…) x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. The change in temperature one had never occurred to me until today (another person has also mentioned it) – and makes a lot of sense, given that the cold snap and my aura coincided almost exactly. Sorry to hear that you, too, are afflicted. Will try your painkiller and relaxation idea. Thanks. xxx

      Liked by 1 person

        1. I know! ‘Tis most unlike me. My only excuse – inadequate, I know! – is the fact that I have not visited Street’s Lindt shop in recent months: Once visited, all other Lindt pales into insignificance! xxx


          1. Exactemente, mon ami! It had crossed my mind that a certain shop was not a million miles away! I know not everyone would plan a move around Lindt chocolate, availability of, but for the serious chocoholic, absolutely de rigueur! xxx


  5. I suffered with migraines for years, turned out to be stress (work though I was OK Monday to Friday, the migraine would start 6pm Firday and be gone by 7am Monday) and oranges! Had the doc to the house once, gave me a jab in my backside which cured my sore throat (and the headache).

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I read about oranges being a trigger whilst waiting in the doctor’s surgery to find out why I’d had a migraine type headache for so long. Vitamin C boost and all that I;d been having a naval orange every day for weeks…… yeah, just before the headache started (sigh).

        Liked by 1 person

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